Chef Clarks' Feed Your Face - Vol 1 No 2


Welcome to another great month of cooking with Chef Clark

This month we are going to talk about.....


Man what a cool phrase. Porkchops.... and applesauce.
Say it with one side of your mouth closed. Ready?

Porkchops......and applesauce. Isn't that fun?
Whew.... I'm excited. The porkchops and applesauce dish was founded by
Peter Brady from the BRADY BUNCH.
What a great show. What a cool guy. I really liked his sister Marsha. She was hot!

Buying porkchops at the store have become a consumer challenge. You can either pay $2.85 per lb for cheap, crappy, fat laced, heart attack surprise, wake up in the morning & run to the toilet, wish you were at your Mama's, kind of chops. OR you can buy the $4.79 per lb boneless, butterfly cut, thick as a baby's arm, screw the electric bill, have another beer, check out that hot ass babe, think your gonna get lucky, impress the boss for a raise, kind of chop.

If you buy the cheaper version...
Brown the chops in a pan that is hot with NO butter or oil. The pan needs to be hot enough to prevent sticking but don't burn your place down or anything (unless you like that kind of thing). After all the chops are browned/seared, turn down the heat to medium low, add half of a jar of chunky applesauce, cover and leave the damn thing alone for 30 minutes. Don't take the cover off to look at it before the 30 minutes. I hate it when people do that. Marsha would never do that!.

If you buy the nice butterfly thick chops, I suggest firing up the grill. These kind of chops were made for grilling. Use a jar of smooth applesauce to baste the chops while they cook.
MMMMMM gooooood!
Sometimes while I'm grilling pork chops I think about how nice it would be
to live in the Brady's house.

Watching Marsha eat. Watching Marsha comb her hair. Watching Marsha while she sleeps.
Watching Marsha get all wet washing the family car......
Sometimes I think about Jan and Tiger, Oh well...

Once again, if you need any cooking advice don't hesitate to E-Mail me.

By the way, if anyone knows Marsha's e-mail address,


I need to know where she is, she doesn't answer her phone anymore.
She loves me, she just doesn't know it yet. Please tell me!!!!!!

Chef Clark Jewell is currently under heavy sedation at a mental facility in Madison, WI -
a state where, incidentally, the Brady's often vacationed.

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