Feed Your Face, Vol 1 No 8: In Search Of The Perfect Kids Meal

In Search Of The Perfect Kids Meal
So you just picked up your kids after letting them swim all day at the public pool. You’re tired. They are hungry. You will feed them anything just to shut them up.
What do you do? You mention that you could whip up some Mac and Cheese at home. The whine from the back seat is so strong that you consider voluntary deafness.

Well, I have some kid’s meals that will please everyone.
Never fear, Chef Clark is here.

I make these all the time at my house. Call it a special inspiration or sleep deprivation. But I love to see my kids happy.

Raisinets and Marbles In A Tied Up Sock

Just get a jumbo box of Raisinets and some old marbles.
Mix in a large bowl. Find some socks lying around the house and stuff with mixture.
Tie socks with a rubber band towards the front so that the bulge is heavy and they could swing it with the other end.

I encourage my kids to swing it real hard and fast above there heads. You can also tell them the story of King David and the giant. A good way to promote religion in the house.

Sauerkraut and Chopsticks

Buy a big can of sauerkraut and put it in a large bowl.
Get a bunch or two of chopsticks and stick them in the sauerkraut.
Make sure the kids only use one chopstick to eat the sauerkraut with. Tell them they can’t leave the table until all the sauerkraut is gone or they will get a whippin’.
I usually take a nap ’cause it takes them at least four hours to do this.

Oatmeal In A Hat

This one is quick and simple.
Get some hats. Fill them with your kids favorite oatmeal.
Tell them they can’t use hands or silverware to eat it.
I always give a special prize to the child who is done first. This is a good problem solving skill to teach.

Flaming Marshmallow Baskets

I like to do this on holidays and birthdays.
Get some empty craft baskets and fill them with a bag of the jumbo sized marshmallows.
Pour some 151 Bacardi over the marshmallows and allow to soak for at least 15 minutes.
Choose one child to be the “Special Lighter Child”.
Have the child light the baskets very quickly.
This always brings tears to my eyes as I watch the delight/terror from the faces of all the children.

Well that’s it for this month or so.
I’m expecting another baby soon. Guess I need to buy more lighters and baskets…

Chef Clark Jewell is the father of two happy and healthy children and is, so far, not being questioned by the Wisconsin Child Welfare Authorities