What Went Right? DEFENSE! DEFENSE! DEFENSE! The best defensive side on the planet, allowing only one goal in seven matches across two World Cups. These guys are a dam; nothing gets past them. Switzerland’s defense is big, physical, disciplined, organized, and unyielding. Calling them tactically rigid in the back is a profound understatement. Get into their final third and they are the undisputed best at closing down space, cutting off passing lanes, putting a body on you, making textbook tackles, and dispossessing you of the ball, your wallet and your underwear. The cherry on top is that they are equally supreme at defending set pieces, corners and free kicks. Switzerland was the recipient of a rare, momentary yet spectacular clusterfuck in Spain’s defense, finishing off the goal that resulted in the biggest upset of the tournament; not even the best attack in the world could get past this defense —
What Went Wrong? — Because otherwise Switzerland has arguably the worst offense in World Cup history. These guys wouldn’t know how to score a goal deliberately to save their lives. Allowing one goal across two World Cups is surreally offset by the fact that they’ve only scored three goals in seven games across the same two World Cups, and only one in South Africa (the aforementioned one against Spain). I’d go into detail about what they can’t do in attack, but it would be a waste of time and space. So I’ll just put it this way: WHEN IT COMES TO ATTACKING SWITZERLAND ISN’T ANY GOOD AT ANYTHING! The only way water can get past a damn is if there is a breach, and that was the only way Chile got a goal past them; a Swiss player was sent off early. If that doesn’t happen then it’s Switzerland in the Round of 16 and not Chile. So we should probably thank Chile for saving us all the trouble of having to watch any more of a Swiss side this stultifying with an attack this colossally bad.
Who Stepped Up To The Plate? New netminder Diego Benaglio is stepping in ably as a keeper who gets to everything. The center of defense, Philippe Senderos and Stephane Grichting, is second to none in the world, and they didn’t miss a cylinder when Steve von Gergen had to come in for an injured Senderos. Same for the fullbacks, Reto Ziegler and Stephan Lichtsteiner. Benjamin Juggel and Gokhan Inler took a backseat to no one when it came to interrupting the opposition attack in front of the backline. And the swiss could rely on their reserve subs to keep it all going.
Who Didn’t Show Up? Spain’s defensive lapse aside, Gelson Fernandes and Tranquillo Barnetta couldn’t service a whore. Blaise N’Kufo and Eren Derdiyok couldn’t finish a sentence. And would you guys please stop finding a spot for Alex Frei? He’s been a useless forward at this level and it’s getting embarrassing. Midfield and attacking subs were just plain useless.
How Was The Coaching? I think I expected a little more attacking adventure and vision from as stellar a coach as Ottmar Hitzfeld. So in that respect I’m really disappointed.
Did They Finish Where They Were Expected? Not really. With their defense and after the upset of Spain, I think a lot of people had Switzerland advancing to the next round. I’m sure most of us had their defense stifling Chile’s furious yet unorganized and frenetic attack, and we certainly thought they could at least get one goal – ONE GOAL – out of minnows Honduras.
Now What? Jesus H. Christ, it’s been ten years; find a reasonable facsimile of an organized attack, will ya?